


The Mystery of Michael Guerin Remains...Unsolved

by AndreaLyn



Category: Roswell New Mexico (TV 2019)
Genre: Based On Buzzfeed Unsolved, Crack, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-27
Updated: 2019-10-27
Packaged: 2021-01-04 19:04:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,843
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21202559
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AndreaLyn/pseuds/AndreaLyn
Summary: Most people try and hide their internet history because it's inappropriate or embarrassing, but Alex isn't so sure what Michael's got to hide.





	The Mystery of Michael Guerin Remains...Unsolved

“Now, this week, we have a comment from 2001aspacedisaster, who I admit I mostly picked because of the name. Sir, I salute your disaster and appreciate your love of space. He says, ‘The spirit box is a piece of garbage shitty nonsense and Ryan clearly doesn’t understand how radio signals work. Does he also think when his radio station bleeds over multiple frequencies that it’s a ghost?.’ You know what, Space Disaster, he probably does.”

“You picked that because it denigrates the spirit box, didn’t you?”

“The man speaks fact _and_ truth.”

“Oh my god, the frequencies are…”

“Fact and truth!”

* * *

It’s almost three AM when Alex gets home from his research at the library, but the main room in the cabin still has a light on, which means Michael hasn’t gone to sleep yet. Maybe he tried to stay awake? Alex wanders inside, calling out, “I’m home!” and hears shuffling in the other room, which means that Michael hadn’t passed out while waiting for him. 

He’s in the middle of prying off his shoes as he catches sight of Michael slamming his laptop shut quickly.

Way too quickly.

Alex raises his brow, because, “You know that just makes it look like you were watching porn, right?” he points out, seeing as what Michael just did is the _epitome_ of a guilty teenager eager to hide his secrets. Crawling onto the sofa with Michael, he takes the laptop to try and open it up, but no matter what he does, it stays sealed shut. “Seriously, Guerin?” he deadpans.

Using his powers to keep Alex from seeing what he’s been watching is low.

“All right, fine, if you’re watching super kinky porn at three in the morning, that’s clearly a message,” Alex sighs, like he’s horribly, terribly long-suffering, “Then maybe I need to spice up your life so you’re not so desperate for something else to get your rocks off.” 

Clearly, whatever is on the laptop stands no chance up against that offer from Alex, because Michael all but throws the thing to the floor (and okay, Alex cringes a little because he helped refurbish that laptop and he doesn’t want to see it broken). It’s early in the morning and Alex is exhausted, but he feels that second wind kicking in as Michael stares at him with that _hungry_ look in his eyes. 

“I’ll show you spice,” he growls at him and grabs Alex to pin him to the bed.

Wriggling slightly, Alex stretches out his body until he’s completely elongated and pinned on his back with his wrists above his head, heart pounding in his chest. “Oh, damn,” he sarcastically deadpans. “That sounds _terrible_.”

Michael grins as he presses biting kisses down Alex’s neck, unbuttoning his shirt to continue his assault. “I’ll show you just how terrible I can be.”

With something new to focus on, Alex forgets about the laptop incident completely.

For now.

* * *

On Fridays, there’s a standing lunch date at the Crashdown for Team Science (as they’ve dubbed themselves, even though Michael keeps insisting it’s only a placeholder). Usually, it’s Kyle, Liz, and Michael who are discussing their new medical or scientific theories about aliens, and Alex shows up to eavesdrop and see if anything sounds like it comes from the Project Shepherd files.

This Friday, he shows up in the middle of what sounds like a drag-down argument. 

“Michael, you cannot tell me that you’re still a Shaniac!” 

Alex wonders what the hell he’s walked into, but the way Kyle and Liz are shouting at Michael, he suspects something’s gone terribly wrong. He also has no idea what the fuck they’re talking about, and he thinks it shows on his face when he gets to the booth and gives them all an expectant look, waiting for the explanation. 

The furor dies down almost instantly at Alex’s reproachful look, with Kyle almost looking embarrassed and Michael looking smug.

“Don’t look like that, it’s not attractive,” Alex warns, climbing into the booth with Michael.

“Lies,” Michael retorts.

“Can you talk some sense into your boyfriend?” Kyle pleads, actually pleads with both hands clasped together.

It’s clearly serious if Kyle is begging like this. Michael drapes his arm around Alex’s shoulders as Alex leans over to steal fries from his plate. He’s not sure what’s got Kyle so worked up, because usually when he and Michael bicker, they’re both spitting mad and angry, but right now it looks like Kyle’s the only one in an exasperated sweat, though Liz doesn’t look too far behind, even if her disbelief is quieter. Michael’s pleased as punch, seemingly unaffected by the argument, and that’s why it’s strange.

Kyle digs out his phone and slides it across the table to Alex. “This!” he snaps, and presses play on an episode of something called _Buzzfeed Unsolved_, which goes into a detailed discussion about Roswell. It’s all wrong, thank god, but he doesn’t see the harm. 

He shakes his head. “I don’t get it.”

“Your boyfriend is a Shaniac,” Liz informs him.

Alex blinks, feeling like he couldn’t have more of a blank expression on his face if he tried.

Kyle and Liz share a long sigh. “It means, he’s a skeptic,” Kyle says. “Doesn’t believe in ghosts…”

“Nah, more likely to be infrasound or something completely logical. All that bullshit with the spirit box is clearly just reaching,” Michael interrupts, and Kyle looks like he might explode, which Alex is probably going to have to do something about.

With a deep breath, Kyle continues, “Doesn’t believe in demons…”

“Humans are bad enough.”

“…and,” Kyle keeps charging forward, “he’s saying he _doesn’t believe in aliens_!” he finishes, and that explains why Kyle looks like he’s about to explode. It’s kind of a tall ask, given that you’re supposed to believe in aliens, when you are one.

“I stand firm and proud as a Shane Madej ally,” Michael insists, pounding his fist twice over his heart.

“Michael,” Liz hisses. “_You are an alien_.”

“I’m not in the sense they’re talking about!” he argues instantly. “It makes a difference!”

He’s got that stubbornly determined face that he gets when he’s not going to give up the fight. Alex reaches for Michael’s drink to sip it, settling back into the booth because he knows better than to argue with Michael on this one. He allows the dulcet sounds of his bickering friends and boyfriend soothe him as he eats most of Michael’s lunch for him. 

He knows better than to get in the middle of this argument, but Alex does make a mental note to try and figure out what the hell they’re talking about.

* * *

“Another excellent point about aliens from our Space Disaster friend, who’s pointing out that the physiology our so-called witnesses happened to see looks pretty human, ergo, Area 51’s little grey men is probably more likely to be some kind of radiation side-effect on children than real aliens, which, honestly, if you haven’t seen Chernobyl, let me tell you, you should get on board, and you should get on board with this theory.”

“…that’s dark, Shane. That’s really, very dark.”

“What can I say, my new friend’s a dark guy, but I got your back, Space Disaster.”

* * *

“So,” Alex says, when he sees Michael hiding his laptop yet again in a panicked rush when Alex comes home unexpectedly early. “I’m almost afraid to ask if it’s that porn you’re watching or…”

Michael’s never been a good liar, but the guilt on his face is enough to tell whole stories. Whatever this weird Unsolved thing is, Alex thinks it’s better than finding out that Michael has some strange kink where maybe he wants Alex to dress up as a baby or get lashed with a whip. Those are things he can’t deal with.

Finding out your boyfriend has some weird internet habits that involves a show online? Yeah, that’s in the realm of the acceptable.

“Guerin…” Alex gives him a warning look and sticks out his hand. “Laptop, please.”

Michael grumbles, but hands it over and this time doesn’t even use his powers to keep it shut. He must figure that since Kyle sold him out, there’s no point hiding it. Alex pries open the laptop to find a comment half-started on a video, talking about a study done on infrasound that can cause feelings of awe and fear in humans, and how half the supposedly haunted locations they visit might simply be a result of that. 

“This may be the nerdiest thing I’ve ever seen you do,” Alex says matter-of-factly, closing up the laptop carefully, “and you’re a nerdy alien genius trying to rebuild a spaceship without the instructions.”

Michael opens his mouth to argue, but Alex isn’t done.

He presses a finger to Michael’s lips, wanting to finish. “It’s also possibly the most incredible and weird and sexy side-hobby that you could ever have.” He leans in to kiss Michael hard, pinning him to the couch, because conspiracy theories are something he’s always unabashedly loved (even when he found out he’s been living in one), and his only gripe is that Michael’s been doing this secretly.

Maybe tomorrow, Alex will let Michael sit him down and they’ll watch the whole playlist together, even if he thinks Kyle and Liz are going to be _thoroughly_ disappointed when he ends up on Michael’s side of the whole thing.

Because, why _would_ ghosts be real?

Just because he has sex with an alien who happens to possess telekinetic powers doesn’t mean they’re about to run into Casper. There are limits to what a person can believe and besides, in today’s technological era, shouldn’t there be way more photos and videos of…

Yeah, he’s starting to see how Michael can get so swept away. 

“Pants off,” Alex demands insistently. 

Tomorrow, he’ll help Michael research the infrasound study and watch hours worth of niche internet videos, but right now, the only mystery Alex intends to solve is how quickly he can get Michael to come with only his fingers.

* * *

“You know, we haven’t heard from our Space Disaster friend lately. Wherever you are, Space Disaster, I hope wherever he is, up there in the stars, he found his way home.”

“Oh my god, he’s just some dude on the internet.”

“Incorrect. He’s a Space Disaster.”

* * *

Michael almost replies to that specific post-mortem, if only to clarify one little sticking point – he’s a _bisexual_ Space Disaster, but seeing as Alex is looking at him intently over the top of the computer, he’s not sure he wants to be pedantic on the internet when there are _way_ better things to do.

“Those pants better not be back on,” Michael warns, closing down his laptop.

Alex wriggles a little under the blanket, raising his eyebrows in a cool, suave way that Michael could never hope to replicate. “This week,” he mocks, “we investigate whether my boyfriend can figure out whether I’m pantsless and then, what he’s going to do about it.”

Hours later, Michael is _pleased_ to say that particular mystery is _solved_.


End file.
